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This Is Not My Chaos

BOY OH BOY OH WHOA! Anybody else had a LOT of chaos over these last couple weeks?!? YOWZA. (if your week has been pretty chill and orderly, I LOVE THAT FOR YOU!) I mentioned a bit of chaos last weekend, and for me this has continued like wow. For me, I knew I needed to sort through some of the WHOA in order to not totally lose my mind, in order to...find some order...and this is the mantra I landed on: THIS IS NOT MY CHAOS. Does this ever happen to you? Folks are in chaos around you (at work, at home, out in the world, all of the above) and you realize you're trying to manage all of it, being expected to fix at least some of it, and everyone else's crisis unexpectedly becomes yours?!? (if this doesn't happen, I LOVE THAT FOR YOU!) But whew. This definitely happens to me. (and it's been happening to a bunch of my favorite people lately) What I want to share here with my This Is Not My Chaos mantra isn't that we shouldn't help, isn't that we don't care or pay attention to people hurting around us. What I want to share here is a clarity I've found helpful, where you can create a boundary around what's yours to carry and what's someone else's to carry. Sometimes we help others carry their weight! That's being a good friend, a good human! FOR SURE! And sometimes we're carrying something that doesn't actually help and might be the weight just heavy enough to break us. And sometimes we're carrying our own junk from so long ago, we forget it's in our arms, and if we could just put it down, we'd have the strength for something new. Right when I needed it, I stumbled across a poem that I've been sharing everywhere. What weight can you put down right now, willingly relinquishing the pointed quills of guilt or judgment? What burden of the heart can lift, what dark corner can be lit, the candle flickering at first, then burning bright? With the next breath, let it go, that old story you’ve told yourself a million times. Whatever doesn’t serve you on this path of truth, leave it behind. Offer this one gift: the simple sacrifice that in the giving sets you free to fully live. (by Donna Faulds)


YES YES I LOVE THIS YES. Putting down the weight. Releasing the density you might have built up in your body to carry it. With the next breath, letting go of the old story. Whatever doesn't serve. You or others. Do you have any of those lessons that come up in your life over and over and over and over and over (and so on), where you're like - oh, man, I thought I had actually figured this one out but here is that same lesson again so I guess I'm still learning ??? Well, this is mine. Now ya know. Over and over and over. I'd like to think as I learn and grow, I can at least notice it all more quickly. Maybe each time I get better at sorting, at recognizing, at taking action. (maybe. figuring out how to be a person is so tricky, no?) I guess what I'm saying is: I hope you can relate, and I hope the lessons I'm always learning can in some way be helpful to you on your path of figuring out how to be a person, also. Together this week, let's practice noticing when we get caught up, when we are holding onto something that no longer serves, when we take on someone else's weight at a time our arms are already full. With the next breath, let it go.

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